SHYNESS
Written by Capriole Choy
Shyness refers to discomfort, inhibition, excessive caution in interpersonal relations. Specifically, shy people tend to be timid about expressing themselves, are overly self-conscious about how others are reacting to them, are easily embarrassed, and experience physiological symptoms of their anxiety, such as a racing pulse, blushing, or an upset stomach.
There are 3 key steps to dealing with this problem:
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Analyze your shyness
Analyze your shyness and try to pinpoint exactly what social situations tend to make you feel shy. Ascertain what causes or triggers your shyness in specific situations.
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Building your self-esteem
Poor self-esteem appears to be a key factor underlying shyness. It is important for shy people to work on improving their self-confidence
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Improving social skills
It is not easy to change deeply ingrained habits. Specify and increase certain target social responses, then reward yourself for engaging in those responses. You have to be realistic and word towards gradual improvement. You may start with relatively simple and non-threatening social behaviours, such as anonymous conversations. For example, saying hello or having conversations with strangers in public places, or giving compliments to others.
Another way is to select a non-shy role model to observe. Watch how he or she handles various kinds of social situations. Pay attention to how he or she acts in situations that trigger your shyness.
Develop some expertise in some areas so that you may have something to contribute in conversations.
Listen actively and attentively. People love to talk about themselves. Encourage them to do so. As you work on developing your social skills, bear in mind that they are sharpened over a lifetime. Although they can be improved with practice, it normally takes a bit of time and you may not notice the progress. However, stick with it, you can conquer shyness.